blackbird

What an interesting day.  Let me just start off by saying that I love winter.  I love it.  I love the snow.  I love driving in the snow.  I love wearing thousands of layers.  I love taking a hot bath at bedtime and then slathering on lotion and putting on your pajamas and socks so that it seals all the lotion in and crawling into bed a gooped-up mess with a book and a cup of hot chocolate or chamomile tea.  I love soup season and snow boots and peacoats or parkas and mittens and hats and puffy vests and sleeping in sweatpants.  If I ever feel inclined to cook more than usual or experiment, it's during winter.  I love that it's the time of year where people slow down and go into hibernation mode.  And I love the quiet it brings.  And I love it's sheer beauty... stark, white, pure.  It's my favorite.

But today was not exactly the epitome of wintry bliss.

St. Louis was nuts today.  I knew it the moment I stepped out the door this morning to clear off my car and was greeted by the sounds of sirens on the main roads a few miles from my house.  And they wouldn't stop.  I knew it when it took me 20 minutes to drive 2 miles to get to the first main highway and an additional hour to get out to St. Charles County, a drive that normally only takes half an hour.  And I was driving against traffic.  Many people in the area had 3 and 4-hour commutes today, spending as much time (if not more) in the car than at their jobs, thanks to the black ice and lack of salt prep.  And there was some ridiculous number of accidents reported to the Missouri Highway Patrol Troop C by 9:30 this morning... something like 240, I think?? (click here to access the Post-Dispatch article of today's events).  It. was. insane.

And at the end of the day, it seems like today is just another wintry day, like any other... dark, cold, and oh-so-quiet.  Even my roommates all went to bed early.

But I thank God all my family members are safe.  Seriously thankful.  I'm even thankful my brother was sick today so he couldn't go out, despite school being called off.

I don't know what prompted me to post about all this...

Maybe it's because today it struck me again that sometimes the things we find most beautiful can also be dangerous, even deathly at times.  Man...

Maybe it's because strangely enough, I've felt called to pray for the safety of myself and my family members all week prior to today.  And not just a little.  And not having any idea why I felt it so strongly.

Or maybe it's because there's something to there being snow on the ground outside on a night after 11 pm that makes me want to blog about whatever's on my mind...

Hibernation, indeed.

Things here are good.  I'm over-satiated with students.  14 + 1 adult.  Full is full... is full indeed.  But I love them all and somehow knew that there would be little rest for the near-weary this semester.  The winter/spring semester is always so insane.  So I buckle down and set to the work God has blessed me with and hope I don't die along the way.  And I'm gaining a better vision for what I want to do long-term over the course of the next 5-10 years professionally, which is something I never would've really envisioned (not that it's anything much different than what I'm doing now) but completely makes sense... clearer, if you will.  The ultimate goal will be a while in coming, but kind of like running... you have to start now to get anywhere long-term.  And maybe that is what is much clearer.  I have trouble starting if I'm not sure of the bigger picture.  I always experienced this in college when writing my research.  Everything needs time to ferment, or in my mind it does, at least.  All those adults out there who will tell you that experience is invaluable and it takes time (like, lots of time) to develop yourself, both as a person and a professional... hate to say it, but they're so incredibly beyond right, it's just not even funny :)

And tonight I made grilled cheese with gluten-free bread and cranberry-orange goat cheese.  Yum just doesn't even come close.

The choirs at Lutheran High are working on a really beautiful arrangement of The Beatles' "Blackbird."  It is so stinkin' great.  My only regret is that it's a cappella.  So they only need me for it as a rehearsal accompanist.  But the score is great and it gets in my head and stays forever and I am completely fine with that.  It kind of reminds me of winter, actually.

Anyway, I'm out of chamomile tea...

... from my den to yours, good night :)